No Funeral House on the list!

So the magical day finally arrived, my first ever visit with a psychiatrist. For those who have not read my previous blog posts, no, i have not gone totally bonkers as yet, it was a visit in preparation of my gastric bypass operation. It was the second to last visit of specialists i had to go through and it was the objective that the psychiatrist would do an evaluation to see if i am not only physically, but foremost also mentally prepared for the operation and the years after.

I was undeniably a bit nervous for this "interview"' I will admit, and i think it was because i could "fail" it. Failing it would have meant that he would have thought that I would not be able to take on the stresses and the life changes that this operation would bring along. Nevertheless, that day, i woke up, had my shower, didn't brush my teeth any different from any other day and got a drop to the hospital.

Having arrived, i went to ask at the reception where the psychiatric ward was. I had an invitation letter in my hands, in a hospital envelope and suddenly saw the point of view of the receptionist with me asking that question. Here is this suspiciously smiling guy with an invitation letter asking for where the psychiatric ward may be.... How can i get him going in the right direction without making a commotion right here at the reception desk?

She smiled right back at me and told me to go to the second floor, following the blue line to the orange elevators. Heh, yeah, right, sure... The orange elevators, of course, why didn't i think of that one myself!

I was about 30 minutes early, nothing abnormal for me, I'm  usually early for any meeting and things would have had to go awkwardly wrong if i ever arrive late for a meeting. But having that extra half hour, i thought it would be a good idea to go and look for those orange elevators, and lets not forget the blue line!

Seemed the lady at the desk actually knew what she was talking about, the darling, the orange elevators actually existed, so i took them to the second floor. I came out and there was staring at me, the reception desk for the psychiatric department.

For some totally crazy reason, a weird please to go and announce your arrival. But hey, i still had twenty minutes left and i did have to go to the bathroom, so why not take advantage of the situation as there was a toilet area facing me just on the opposite side of the orange elevators. Good idea to go to the bathroom in a hospital? In a psychiatric department? Well, i was still in "neutral" area, so thought it couldn't be too bad an experience, and hey, at least it wasn't next to the cafeteria where absolutely everybody pays visits after downing all the coffees. It was after all also still early in the morning, so in I went.
Being a hotel management graduate, and an airport management specialist, I do have experience with frequently visited toilets, and proper precautions dictate that wiping the seat is the minimum one can do before taking seat. Placing paper on the seat is a second precautionary step, so i also did that and took place on my throne away from home. Then, suddenly somebody switched off all the lights, yes, ALL the lights, pitch dark it was! I could have sworn that i was the only person in the toilet?
Recap time, i am just outside the psychiatric area, in a bathroom with toilet paper in my hands as last defense for anything that could happen. There was audibly nobody else in the gents bathroom, but maybe they were "testing" me to see if i could hold things up when stressed or if i would run out screaming and get an "F" on my report one time? Then i heard some slight chatter in the room next door, presumably the ladies room, and then a "click" and the lights went back on. Good try ladies, but it will take more than that to woosh me of my throne of bravery. Now, seriously, of all the times for this to happen to me, just outside of a psychiatric area opposite the orange elevators? A master switch for all the lights in the women's bathroom? Oh come on!

So with that bathroom episode behind me, i went in line to announce my arrival to the department, yep, in line.... So that means, behind others, other what? I can only suppose. Waited in line for some minutes before it was my turn, and when the next friendly receptionist (hey, hold on, did she turn off my lights earlier? Eh?) took time to address my needs i was simply told i didn't have to register, just to go to the end of the corridor, turn left and see the secretary there. So said, so done, and when i found that secretary she smiled at me again, i guess she was also taking the safe approach to this new individual coming into her office, cant blame her...hahaha, poor woman didn't know about my bathroom experience.
After some admin matters, she asked me to take place in the little waiting area outside in the corridor. I am easy, so I complied, still was ten minutes early by that time. In the same waiting area was a young woman, also waiting as a patient, I supposed, she was patiently waiting...yeah, ok, lets not go there. I was kind of relieved of all the previous stress there, i was willing to let the cards fall whichever way they did, nothing could bring me out of my concentration for the interview at that point. Now, i wouldn't make note of that if nothing was less true there, now would I ?

This young lady sitting, waiting there, yes, patiently, reading a hospital magazine with the utmost interest, so deeply entranced (should i use that word for anything on that hospital floor?) didn't even see it fit to answer my hello, but i really wasn't going to insist, not on that floor! She did although suddenly jump up, throw the magazine on the table and rush to another corridor, as if she suddenly was late for an appointment, yes, and then returned to read her magazine. She did that a couple of times. After a while she was invited by four doctors to come along, and honestly, it looked to me as if she was applying for a job or something, well, lol, she would fit right in!

There was also the other secretary, a second one in another office, with open doors,  who passed both of us straight when going to the bathroom without saying hello, nor hello again when she came back.
With all these unfriendly people around, i couldn't blame my co-patient/interviewee for delving into her magazine, as i found myself staring down my blackberry, hoping for something fun to read.

And the suddenly:"HHHHaatsheeewww!!!!!!" ... From the corner of the unfriendly secretary's office, a sneeze, so loud that I think even three corridors further echoes of it would have been heard. My co-patient and i both looked up and saw the secretary on all fours, on the floor, between her chair and her desk, looking at us both as we said, in a cool way, both together:"Bless You!".....

Recap II : She had obviously dropped something on the floor and whilst trying to find it got dust in her nose and was caught on her hands and knees by possibly psychiatric patients...poor girl i thought.... I also thought, nice try, i am not going to get distracted from my interview... I am all concentration!

And then the moment came, the psychiatrists door opened, the previous patient came out, looking left and right, i don't know if she was expecting a car in the corridor or something, good grief, anyway, it was my turn now! I am prepared, nothing can blow me from my pedestal!

Yeah, so how do you like a psychiatrist in a wheelchair for a change? Yes, My psychiatrist came rolling out of his office to come and greet me.... Honestly, never wanted to smile so hard in my life and still managed to keep it in...hahaha, the things they try!

Anyhow, psychiatrist was a very nice older fellow, just had a chat with me to verify and make sure that i understand what this operation will do to me physically, that i agree to it and to check if i have family support. Also to see if i think i will able to cope with then resulting changes after the operation, how my diet will change, how my body will change, and how i will need to find other things to preoccupy myself in different ways instead of eating or snacking.

I passed the test with flying colors and he told me he would write my prof a positive recommendation for me to go forward with the operation.

I will tell you, all kidding aside, that i do feel very comfortable with the operating team, all the specialists I have met during the pre-operative interviews and it is good to know that there is a team ready for me, whatever happens along the line. Also good news, they did not add gravediggers or funeral arrangers to the list of people i have to meet before then operation, and that has settled a lot of my nerves as well.

Off to the dietician next!